I used an agent and made an ad.
It paid for my next round of drinks.
Then my agent texted me a message.
She said, ‘Your agent just texted me, saying, ‘Hey, we’re looking to put a big, fat, red, yellow, orange, and pink ad on your page.’
I was like, ‘What?
No way, what are you talking about?
You’re a dumb fucking agent.’
I told her, ‘You have no idea what I’m talking about.’
I texted her back, ‘No way.
I didn’t text you back.’
She said I should just stop doing what I was doing.
I was a fucking agent.
I started making the same mistakes I had made on Facebook.
I said, I have a friend who is a lawyer.
He texted me back, I said what do you mean I’m a fucking lawyer?
He said, the guy you’ve been texting is not a lawyer, you’re a fucking fucking agent.
“”He was right.
I went back to Facebook and said, no, this is what I did, and I did it on a public Facebook page.
“”I told him, ‘I didn’t want to put that ad on the page, so I just stopped.’
“”And I didn to make any more mistakes.
I made the same mistake again.
I got caught in the middle of this whole thing and I started posting the same shit on Facebook again.
So then he called me a dumb agent again.
He called me, ‘How many fucking times do I have to say that?
Why are you acting like this?
Why am I acting like that?
What are you fucking talking about?’
He said the same thing.
And he’s a fucking dumb fucking lawyer.
So I said to him, what do I do?
I said I want to be a fucking public agent again.
“”And he was like ‘I can’t do that, I can’t get hired again, because you’re going to get sued.
So you can’t work again.’
“”I said, why do you need to be so fucking dumb?
Why do you want to get me sued for something that’s totally illegal?
You want to go to jail?
What the fuck are you even doing here?
“”So he sent me a letter and he said, we’ll sue you for $20 million if you can prove you’re not a public agent.
And I was devastated.
I don’t know how he did that.
I thought I had the answer.
But the lawyer said, that’s just an argument, we don’t want that money.
I just thought I’d give it a shot.
And so, I went to my lawyer and said I can show that the ad was made on a private Facebook page.
And then they said, you can show it on Facebook, but if you show it to a public person, you’ll get sued for $1 million.
“”But I didn and they said ‘no, you don’t have to show it.
You don’t need to show that.
We’ll sue if we can prove that.’
And I’m like, this isn’t a private message.
This is on Facebook.
“”So I got a bunch of emails.
A lot of emails from different attorneys.
And one guy sent me an email saying, I just want to thank you for giving me the confidence to go ahead and do this.
I had just been fired from my job and I was desperate.
I’m trying to get a little money, I’m desperate.
But I just felt like I had to do it.
And it took me five years to get it done.
And this guy who’s a lawyer told me, we want to do this for you, and we want you to give us the confidence that you’re an agent.
He said ‘don’t worry about it, you’ve got a lawyer.’
And that’s how I went on Facebook and I just kept doing it.
“”Then I got another email saying ‘we just want you.
You’re an employee.
We want you here.’
And he said ‘you’re an assistant manager.
You can go get this agent.’
And so I went and got that agent.
“And the agent told me he was going to do something for me, he was coming down.
I asked him, I was really nervous.
I knew I couldn’t do it, but I just said ‘I’m going to go for it.’
I had a friend come up and we got him in.
I talked to him for an hour and then I got him to sign a contract.
I wrote him a letter.
I sent him a copy of my contract and he wrote me a copy.
I took the agent to the office and I signed my contract.
And they said they were going to sue me for $40 million.
I’ll do my best to get this lawyer’s name. “
He said, thank you.
I’ll do my best to get this lawyer’s name.
I’d love to talk to you, but